The Road to Healing: Mental and Physical Health During Cancer

When Healing Feels Out of Reach

A week ago, I shared a post about anxiety and depression. And here I am today, talking about them again. Funny, right? But in all seriousness, this week has been a tough one. My mental health has taken a hit, and it has been hard to shake off. But everywhere I turned, there were signs reminding me that things do get better, even when they feel like they will not. One moment that stuck with me was seeing a shirt that said, “Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.” That statement hit harder than I expected because this week, my battle feels heavier than usual.

It all began when I had issues with my Optune device—an essential part of my treatment. It was malfunctioning, and that triggered a chain reaction. Headaches, nausea, and just a general feeling of being off flooded in. And if you have ever had a chronic illness, you know what I am talking about. When something goes wrong with your body, it is hard not to immediately think, "Is this it? Is this a sign the cancer is getting worse?" Optune is a powerful tool, but like everything else, when it goes wrong, the psychological toll is steep. And healing takes a hit when fear steps in.

The Hidden Battle Behind the Smile

It is not just brain cancer patients who go through this—I am sure people battling breast cancer, colon cancer, or any other life-threatening illness feel the same way. Every ache, every symptom makes you wonder if your worst fears are coming true. It is exhausting to live like that, always waiting for the other shoe to drop. You try to focus on healing, but it feels like your brain is screaming something else entirely.

Despite all this, I do my best to stay focused on other things. People around me constantly tell me that I am “the most positive person” or that I have “such a great attitude.” And while I appreciate those comments, the truth is, what people see on the outside is not always what is going on inside. Smiling through the pain is something many of us learn to do, because admitting that we are struggling can feel like defeat. Here's the thing: mental health is just as important as physical health, and pretending everything is okay when it is not does not help anyone—especially ourselves.

I hate that I am going through this. I hate that so many of you reading this are probably dealing with something just as difficult, if not more so. But what I have come to realize is that we are all a little broken. We all have cracks and scars, whether they are visible or hidden deep inside. And the real journey is not about pretending those cracks do not exist—it is about figuring out how to put ourselves back together. That is where the real strength lies. That is what healing really is.

The Hardest Days Are the Most Important

So, yeah, this week has been rough. I have had moments where I felt overwhelmed, where the weight of it all seemed too much to bear. But I am still here, still fighting, and still determined to share my story in the hopes that it might help someone else. Because feelings are real, and it is okay to not be okay. In fact, it is human to not be okay sometimes. If we are honest with ourselves, the path to healing has never been about being perfect. It is about being real.

If there is anything I have learned, it is that vulnerability does not make you weak; it makes you real. We are all out here doing the best we can with what we have been given. And sometimes, that means having days or weeks where it feels like you are barely hanging on. That is okay. What matters is that we keep going, keep fighting, and keep reminding ourselves that things can and will get better—even when it feels impossible. This article by the American Cancer Society goes deeper into the mental load cancer survivors often face. Healing means addressing both parts: body and mind.

Healing Isn't Linear—And That’s Okay

So, to anyone who is reading this and feeling like they are carrying a heavy load—you are not alone. We are all fighting battles, and it is okay to ask for help, to take a break, or to just sit with your feelings for a while. The road to healing—whether it is physical, mental, or both—is not a straight line. But it is worth walking, even on the hardest days. One step forward, one moment of honesty, and one breath at a time. That is how healing happens.

There are days when healing looks like drinking water, putting on clean clothes, and checking one thing off your list. There are days when healing means crying into your pillow or needing to talk to someone who understands. And sometimes, healing means doing nothing at all—just breathing, just being. The road is different for everyone. And that is okay.

So why do I continue to write? Because each time I share, I peel back a layer of fear. Each sentence is a reminder that I am still here, and still capable of finding meaning. Sharing these pieces of myself is not just therapy—it is a way of keeping myself grounded. When I sit down to write, I feel like I am taking control of my narrative again. And that sense of purpose? That is a form of healing too.

I will keep working to stay positive, to keep writing, and to keep raising awareness. Because the truth is, the more we talk about these struggles, the less alone we all feel. And if sharing my journey helps even one person feel seen or understood, then it is worth every word. Stay strong, and remember it is okay to not be okay, but it is not okay to give up. We have got this, together. You have got this.

The Power of Healing Through Storytelling
Glioblastoma Foundation
Using Optune to Treat Glioblastoma

Tags: Healing, Cancer, Mental Health, Optune, Glioblastoma, Anxiety, JohnVsGBM

Disclaimer: This content reflects personal experience and should not replace medical advice. Please consult a licensed professional for any health-related decisions.